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Key takeaways

  • LGBTQ+ individuals face complex legal and social challenges in family planning, including barriers to assisted reproductive technology and discriminatory adoption practices.
  • Planning for the care of children within chosen LGBTQ+ families requires careful consideration and documentation.
  • Despite legal progress, persistent biases and social stigma underscore the importance of proactive advocacy and support for LGBTQ+ individuals and their families.

Contributors

Shelby Anderson

Executive Director, Wealth Planning and Advice

Parenthood is a deeply personal journey, and for LGBTQ+ individuals, the journey can also be complex. Advances in reproductive technologies and legal changes have broadened family-building possibilities. However, navigating this path still comes with some distinctive challenges.

Prospective LGBTQ+ parents face unique challenges that vary widely from person to person. Join us as we delve into the complexities of LGBTQ+ family planning.

Each person or couple faces different, complex issues

Making a one-size-fits-all plan to tackle the issues that LGBTQ+ individuals face is difficult because each person’s situation can vary dramatically. State law also varies widely on protections afforded to LGBTQ+ persons. As a result, each individual or couple has different options and choices to make when it comes to building a family.

According to a survey by Family Equality, 63% of LGBTQ+ millennials who are interested in building a family expect to use assisted reproductive technology, foster care or adoption to become parents.1 Younger LGBTQ+ people view these paths to parenthood as more accessible than ever before.

Assisted reproductive technology comes with challenges, too

Assisted reproductive technology encompasses various medical procedures aimed at achieving pregnancy. Using these paths to parenthood can pose a significant challenge for LGBTQ+ individuals due to prevalent health care discrimination, with 56% reporting mistreatment in health care settings.2 To address this issue, it's crucial to choose health care providers experienced in serving LGBTQ+ communities.

Additionally, LGBTQ+ individuals may face heightened costs for assisted reproductive technology, as many insurance policies demand a diagnosis of "infertility" before covering expenses. This diagnosis often necessitates a minimum period of unprotected intercourse without pregnancy, with insurance companies sometimes categorizing same-sex couples as "socially infertile."3

Coverage for procedures like surrogacy may be limited or nonexistent for Medicaid beneficiaries, leaving less affluent LGBTQ+ individuals with limited options for family-building through biological means.4

Also, parental recognition (having both parents’ names on the birth certificate) in assisted reproductive technology can be problematic since some state laws haven't kept up with diverse family structures. While married same-sex couples have the right to have both parents’ names on the birth certificate of their child, unmarried couples face uncertainty in 34 states.56 This recognition is essential for providing children with the legal protections associated with parentage.

To navigate these challenges: It's recommended to seek health care providers experienced in LGBTQ+ reproductive care, carefully review insurance policies for coverage, connect with LGBTQ+ community organizations and advocacy groups for support, and consult an attorney with expertise in parental recognition matters involving LGBTQ+ families.

Adoption and fostering

Private and public adoption are common routes for LGBTQ+ individuals to build families, with same-sex couples being significantly more likely to adopt or foster children than different-sex couples.7 However, discrimination in accessing both private and public adoption opportunities still exists, partly due to the absence of comprehensive federal nondiscrimination laws protecting LGBTQ+ individuals.

State-level protections for LGBTQ+ individuals are inconsistent, with fewer than half of states implementing such laws.8 Additionally, 23 states have enacted religious exemption laws that allow social service agencies to refuse placing children with LGBTQ+ families based on religious beliefs.9

This state-sanctioned discrimination can hinder LGBTQ+ families' access to public adoptions, potentially leading them to consider more costly options like private adoption.10

To address these challenges: It's recommended to connect with LGBTQ+ community organizations and advocacy groups for resources and support, consult an attorney experienced in LGBTQ+ adoption cases, and include adoption costs in wealth planning.

Estate planning

Despite progress in federal and state laws, biases and social stigma remain in many communities, often leading to family rifts and higher rates of LGBTQ+ youth homelessness.11 In response, LGBTQ+ individuals often create "chosen families" for support. However, many state laws don't recognize these chosen families.

To tackle these challenges: LGBTQ+ individuals must carefully plan for their children's care in estate planning documents and protect them from potential opposition by estranged family members who might be favored by default laws as guardians or conservators. Defining "children" in estate documents inclusively, regardless of biological relation, is crucial.

The bottom line

For LGBTQ+ individuals and families, the momentous decision to become a parent comes with a unique set of challenges. Everyone’s situation is different, and laws vary from state to state, but some people may face hurdles including access to healthcare and adoption services. Securing legal recognition for LGBTQ+ parents can also be a difficult process, with a particular impact on estate planning.

No matter the structure of your family, it might be helpful to seek out organizations, attorneys and financial professionals with experience supporting the LGBTQ+ community that can help you along your journey to parenthood. Delve deeper here.

References

1.

Family Equality. LGBTQ Family Building Survey. (August 2023)

2.

American Progress. “Discrimination Prevents LGBTQ People From Accessing Health Care.” (January 2018).

3.

Neyra, O. (2021). “Reproductive Ethics and Family: An Argument to Cover Access to ART for the LGBTQ Community.” Voices in Bioethics, 7 (2021).

4.

Ibid

5.

Supreme Court of the United States. “Marisa N. Pavan et al v. Nathaniel Smith,” (June 26, 2017).

6.

Movement Advancement Project. "Equality Maps: Other Parental Recognition Laws." Accessed August 2023

7.

UCLA School of Law Williams Institute, “How Many Same-Sex Couples in the US are Raising Children?.” (July 2018)

8.

UCLA School of Law Williams Institute, “LGBT People in the US Not Protected by State Non-Discrimination Statutes.” (April 2020)

9.

Movement Advancement Project, “Religious exemption laws.”

10.

Family Equality (2019) “Building LGBTQ+ Families: The Price of Parenthood.” (August 2023)

11.

J.P. Morgan Wealth Management, “Unique Challenges in Retirement and Estate Planning Facing LGBTQ+ Persons.” (2023)

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